Thursday, October 31, 2013

When did "fat" become the new "n" word?! And when did honesty become "bullying"?!

I've had a couple of conversations lately where people have said I can't use the word "fat" to describe myself and I shouldn't use it in general because its derogatory. There's also been a lot of talk of "fat shaming" with the recent FB post of mother of three - Maria Kang's "what's your excuse" image. Somehow people are now treating the word "fat" as derogatory and "bodyracist" in the same way society treats the "n" word. Really?! Are you f'ing
kidding me?!

That body came from not caring and no work
So there's a couple of things to talk about here. First off...I can call MYSELF anything I want. I am describing ME and me alone. The "me I refer to is the one in the picture to the left. I was 5'9", 245 pounds with a 38 inch waist...creeping to 40 inches. There is no other adjective to describe what I was but "fat". That will always be the image in my head...of me. Yes, I know I'm hard on myself. Try being a skinny kid most of your life, then becoming fat and miserable (I won't even get into all the health problems I was suffering from...all of which were exacerbated by the weight) ...and you'd be hard on yourself to stay fit and trim too. I call myself "fluffy" now partly to make light of my personal fat composition struggles and to continue to drive myself to train everyday. But that's me talking about ME. Those people that say "well if he thinks he's fat, what must he think I am?!" are dealing with their OWN problems. I have NEVER called anyone fat nor detracted from others and their fitness journey. I took ownership of my size and health and made changes. I took responsibility for my weight, health and mood. I didn't blame anyone else for it. Sure life may not have been that great at the time and I might've been injured but no one held a gun to my head to keep me out of the gym or eat like it was the apocalypse. I get a hard time from people because they see current me and think I'm naturally this way. My current level of fitness comes from hard work and driving myself to be healthy and fit...and continually motivating myself to be so. And on the flip side of that I just LOVE how my coworkers tell me I'm "manorexic" and I should just "eat a hamburger" because "you're too skinny". What...the...hell?!

Secondly there's an accountability problem in this country. I guess the stats about being the second most obese  nation on the planet (Mexico has us beat) with a jump of 13% of the nation qualified as obese in 1962 to 33.8% of Americans being obese in 2012 isn't "our" fault?! Look, I'm not a fan of every freaking fat food holiday this country "celebrates" (i.e. national donut/candy/ice cream/cake/blond brownie day) but they and the fast food industry didn't make us fat. Our lack of self control of ourselves and our children has made us fat. 

That body came from HARD work and constant effort
Speaking of, I'm 41 (although I think a fit and young looking 41 at that) and I can only remember a handful of obese kids throughout my years of school. Have you looked around lately?! Obesity causing heart attacks is rapidly becoming the number one killer in the 18 and under age group! Are you serious?! Studies show that obesity causes 100k-400k deaths a year and cost our society an estimated $117 BILLION (preventive, diagnostic, treatment, lost work, premature deaths) and EXCEEDS monies spent of alcohol and smoking health care costs. And you have a problem with the word "fat"?! Get over yourself! Its fat. Quit bitching about it and take responsibility for yourself. I'm tired of being politically correct about fat and fat issues ESPECIALLY since I WAS a fat guy and battle everyday to NOT be. Maybe if you stop making excuses, take charge of you own life, quit trying to belittle those that have and actually get your weight under control...you'd live a happier and longer life. One that I'm SURE you're loved ones would appreciate your being in and around for, rather than "lose you early" to crap eating habits and being overweight. And no, I'm not being mean or insulting or a bully...I'm telling the truth. I've lost too many family members to poor health and reasons they could control (almost including myself) to not want to change the "culture" and change myself. Maybe if more people took responsibility for themselves, if doctors and dieticians were honest and we saw each other as part of the solution as opposed to being part of the problem, we'd end up a healthier, fitter nation.  But, I'm sure a lot of people reading this will just think I'm another "fitness Nazi". Ugh.

11 comments:

  1. Effing FANTASTIC post. We tip toe around everything these days and it's turning out negatively. Having a healthy body (not necessarily a ripped, mucle-y, very low body fat but an average healthy body) and having society's values line up with being healthy should be a priority these days. I'm all for the "love your body" movement but love and respect yourself enough to treat your body in a healthy manner.
    We need to take control of our own lives and realize what we're doing on a daily basis has an impact, whether we want to hear it or not. I find the most difficult thing for people to verbalize and admit is that if a young child is obese, it's most likely the parent's fault. Accept responsibility and then act appropriately. The child isn't driving to the grocery store to shop for their own food!

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  2. This is freaking awesome!!!! I was tipping the scales at 390 a little over 18 months ago (228 today) it took a awesome friend to slap me with reality that I was cheating m wife and kids out of being a father and husband.I see obese people now and want to run up and show then my before pic and now and tell them it is possible. I live In the 2nd unhealthiest counties in California. I am doing my part just like you leading by example. Awesome post!!!!!!

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  3. LOVE this!! I am doing what I can do inspire other people (especially stay-at-home moms) that they can make the change.

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  4. I agree with Dutch 100%, I have been fat and I work my ass off to not be fat. I made a choice - a lifestyle choice. Am I perfect hell no, I still eat too many whoopie pies and like my chips pizza and beer too much, but at the same time I do something about it too. I get up and move, it is about taking responsibility for your actions and your own life, not letting others lead you by slick marketing campaigns or whatever the current PC trend or word usage is. There are reasons many of us get fat, some are beyond our control, but many reasons are not. Life is about choices - I have been fat and now choose not to be fat anymore. Great post Dutch!

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  5. Excellent post, and my thoughts exactly. As ex fat people, we are more uniquely positioned on "fat" as people are are not or are currently fat.

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  6. Agreed. I think our society's apathy and "don't bring it up because it's rude" is what is making our country fatter. I know we should be sensitive and not intensely bully people, but completely ignoring the subject isn't doing anybody favors.

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  7. I'm glad you also present the flip side to this as well. I'm always shocked by people who shame me for being bad words like "healthy" or "fit" that they say in the most condescending tone I've ever heard. I work very hard to reach a healthy lifestyle and make good choices, all things we're told to do, and I refuse to feel guilty for it. I guess it's true what they say about people who point a finger, and have 4 more fingers pointing back at them.

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  8. I couldn't have said it better. I am tired of tip toeing around it to. I used to be 324 lbs so I think I have the right to call it what it is.

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  9. Alternative terms for 'Fat':
    (1) Gravitationally Superior
    (2) Circumferencially Enhanced

    :)

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